I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
We left an ass print on the piano.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
