i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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