Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Randomize
