Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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