come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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