I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Randomize
