god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
