I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
