I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
