Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
50% drunk capacity currently
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
