Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
