i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
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