Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
