i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
