Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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