this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
