It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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