There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
