I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
