i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
