Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
