This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
