Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
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