I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize