do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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