Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize