i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
