I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
