Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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