Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize
