No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
