You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
