he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
