well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
