i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize