Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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