We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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