Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
