Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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