I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
