ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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