i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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