All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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