glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize