So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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