Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
