sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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