But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
it was like eating out sand paper
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Boobs speak an international language.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
