id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize