If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
